Messers Jarrod Miller and Neil Aitken 2014 This AGM reviews 2014 - - PowerPoint PPT Presentation

For the attention of the Directors – Messers Jarrod Miller and Neil Aitken 2014

This AGM reviews 2014 using the slide template made available on the new ‘theagm.com’ website

Jarrod and Neil are two blokes who like to do stupid stuff, drink rum, sit on a boat and laugh their asses off.

Executive Summary

2014 was a huge year !

• Sal said she’d marry me !
• Ian managed to get us all on Hurrica V – a $2.5 m

yacht to race Hamilton Island Race week – definitely a highlight !

• My web company – WhatPhone.com.au – started

making enough money to sustain me – and we have plans to grow it overseas.

• I managed to achieve something I set out to do

years ago and sail the boat up the coast, making friends on the way

• However, I did beach the boat on the way up
• And Sal and Jarrod came to visit
• Dumb-assery reached record levels, especially

Jarrod’s birthday but also, realistically, year round.

• We have maintained our traditions and possibly

started a new one.

One of the things I love most about Sal is she’s not materialistic If only we’d had fun last year.

Apologies for Absence

• Free university education in Australia will be

absent from 2014 onwards if the liberals get their way.

• Chart – left – shows a reduction in inflation

adjusted spending on universities and a clear reduction is evident.

• Source
• Jacquie Lambie will be absent from the PUP

from now on after a stouch late this year.

• She said some shocking things about the Burka.
• See next slide.

Apologies for Absence

• Burqas were banned : From the Australian

parliament for around 24 hours in Oct 2014.

• Source
• News story on left : This prompted some

‘intelligent’ debate including someone dressed as a member of the KKK which I found memorable.

January 2014

0% 20% 40% 60% 80% 100% 120%

Coverage vs Whinging ( 2013 )

Vodafone's coverage ( Sydney ) Jarrod's whinging about the Vodafone network

• Jarrod is a Vodafone customer
• In January 2014, research revealed

Vodafone had the best network coverage in Sydney

• This was not reflected in the whinging

about the quality of the network that Jarrod has undertaken.

• Chart left, shows no correlation

between Jarrod’s whinging and network quality measured in objective terms.

Thu 30th Jan at the state theatre, we saw Jimmy Carr which was awesome

January 2014

Above: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qvo8uPYayI

In other news January 2014

• Sal’s birthday week – Sat 25th to Fri 30th
• Boat varnishing started.
• 31st – Neil got screwed by his old company
• Right – we made pirate party cards and a

pirate video to encourage attendance.

• Initial production of cards spiked stupidity

index – Jarrod got the URL wrong ;)

• Distribution of cards and torches was rubbish.

Note – this one has the right URL 

February 2014

Scurry Moleder Guantanimole Guacamole Molester Molecoddle

Moles

• In March, we discussed a

number of things at the pub.

• Critical among them was the

question of how a town of moles would be populated.

• Neil produced the resulting

list on Fiverr.com

• UFO investigation would be

performed by Moleder and Scurry

• Caught terrorist mole would

be called Guantanimole

• Etc

March 2014

• We also went to the Burlesque show at The Steyne, Manly
• The video was posted and has a couple of hundred hits now, mostly Jarrod showing

people me looking like a doughnut on his phone.

• Jarrod was 7balled at pool and didn’t do the run – he was heavily Trolled on FB

March 2014

• With impending departure

from Virgin Mobile, Neil turned his brain off and watched up to 3 Jeremy Kyles a day on You Tube.

• We found time for Burlesque

and Yo Mama.

March 2014

• We went clay pigeon shooting with

some of Jarrod’s mates - the chick was pretty cool.

• And I started a website for ‘The

Bilge Rat alarm’ which then died because I couldn’t get the prototype built. Also the design, left, was *hit.

April 2014

• Anzac Day tradition of

going to the Woolie for Two Up maintained for 4th year in a row.

• Improvement this year

with Rikard and his crazy brother coming.

• Jarrod won again on the

betting

• Challenge for next year is

– will Neil be overseas on the 25th April ?

May 2014

WhatPhone started marking a small amount of money

50 100 150 200 250 300 350 400 $0.00 $200.00 $400.00 $600.00 $800.00 $1,000.00 $1,200.00 $1,400.00 $1,600.00 May-13 Jun-13 Jul-13 Aug-13 Sep-13 Oct-13 Nov-13 Dec-13 Jan-14 Feb-14 Mar-14 Apr-14 Series2 Series1

• The Ratty team ( the boat Neil crews on ) won ‘The Club Champs’ when sailing.
• Neil also spent a lot of April ebaying stuff to clear space for his trip.
• Neil slept the night on Sloop up in Pittwater and anchored off Shelly to practice

using the anchor and cooking on the boat.

June 2014

• June highlight – while Neil got the boat ready, he sent everyone ‘good vibes’ and we went to the

Kraken Rum launch party

July 2014

July 2014 – Sailing to the Whitsundays

• Highlights : Setting sail with Ian,
• Passing Hooters in QLD ( closed )
• Catching up with Koos and Casey
• And, of course, the sailing !

August 2014

• Hamilton Island Race Week.
• Huge highlight for Neil on Hurrica V.
• Ian Dennewald sorted it out.
• We won Le prix D’elegance too !
• This is a must return for 2015.

September 2014

After Hammo – the trip North continued

• We saw some beautiful stuff – like this full moon while at anchor.
• Stopped to prank Hamish and Andy on ‘The People’s Island’ ( Ignored on their return. )
• ‘Showered’ in the sea after long days of sailing until we got to where the stingers were.
• Popped the champagne when we got to the Southern most Island in the Whitsundays.

September 2014

Jarrod’s birthday : Never before seen levels of dumb assery

• Sabering a bottle of champagne is the

height of idiocy. We did 6.

• Field archery with beer
• Cards against humanity
• Nice bacon

Picture of the year ?

October 2014 – Beaching the boat

‘Pancake Gate’

• As a result of me eating

pancakes when I should have been navigating, I slammed Sloop on to the sand and had to wait for the tide to turn.

• Idiocy.

Exhibit A

October 2014 – Jarrod visit mid Oct

That’s a paddlin’

Jarrod’s visit :

• Jarrod was in town for about a

week – just long enough to walk to the boat and back.

• We had long island ice teas on

Long Island. Brilliant.

The Best Birthday Message This year

October 2014 – Sal’s visit

Sal’s trip to see me Oct ‘14 !

• Included luxury on Hayman

Island – including an unplanned Helicopter flight !

• Then we went sailing for a

few days & I popped the question !

November 2014

The Trip Back from The Whitsundays

• Highlights included goat stew on

Percy Island : A big deal for sailors - it’s mentioned in all the books.

• News of Jarrod behaving sensibly

travelled with us as can be seen from the Melbourne cup picture :

December 2014

The Trip back to Sydney in Sloop - 2

• Special mention for the incredible

“Crewman Nick” ( a captain in his

• wn right ) who did the trip

with me ( almost ) all the way North and South.

• Nick had his birthday and we got

him personalized T-Shirts.

• Highlights of the trip South included

a trip around The Bundaberg factory when landlocked by thunderstorms.

• Sailing through Thunderstorms on

the way back – not an advised activity but very beautiful.

• Crew reviews, expressed through

the medium of hat, harsh but fair.

December 2014

• Now back in Sydney / Manly preparing for the wedding

December 2014

Possible new tradition :

• Manly Santa party – 2000 people on a pub crawl

around manly dressed as Santa.

• We made the paper ( albeit The Manly Daily )

dressed as ‘Pimp Santas.’

• This might be good enough to become an annual

tradition.

Boxing Day

• The Sydney to Hobart on Ian’s boat : A great way to spend Boxing Day & bookend the year

Plan for next year

Jarrod - A goal for the year ahead ?

• Obviously my goals include getting

married And business growth as discussed regularly.

• The plan is to get going for a USA

launch in around April / May 2014.

• At some point it would be good to work

through this list of stuff to do in the USA – perhaps when I am over there for work.