Welcome Personal Leadership: Transforming Limiting Beliefs and - - PowerPoint PPT Presentation

Welcome

Personal Leadership:

Transforming Limiting Beliefs and Patterns with THE WORK

BE PRESENT

• Take a moment to arrive.
• Find your breath
• Land in your seat…..

The complex challenges we are facing call on us to lead collaboratively; to host and participate in meaningful dialogue and to co-create across

• ur differences.

How we show up makes a difference.

Agenda

• Complex Challenges, Hosting, Personal

Leadership and Limiting Beliefs

• Introduction to The Work
• Stepping in - Working with Fear exercise.
• Questions, Applications, Resources.
• Close

Principles

• Everyone is here to learn and practice.
• Share what you are comfortable sharing.
• Respect confidentiality of other’s sharing
• Note this session is being recorded.
• Inquire with curiosity & self-compassion
• Hosting self-inquiry (not advice or

problem solving)

Complex Challenges: What is needed?

• Meaningful dialogue - host and participate
• Co-creative work
• Different perspectives
• Capacity for uncertainty, change, discomfort
• Resilience
• Grace

How we show up matters

Self-Hosting/Personal Practice

• Wellbeing and Personal Sustainability
• Develop and Access Key Capacities
• Responsibility - Power
• System Change requires Thinking

Change

Personal Leadership Practice Working with the complex system that is YOU

• Increase our self-awareness
• thinking, emotions & actions
• Inquire into and shift limiting beliefs &

patterns

• Compassionate and rigorous.
• Connected to participation and leadership

“LEADERSHIP”

• How you show up to contribute.
• Positional or from inside the system
• Visible or less visible
• Collaborative or directive

Leadership Reflection Exercise #1

Think of a person whose leadership you admire. Think of a specific, challenging situation where this person showed up with hosting/leadership that had a positive influence.

• Picture the situation and person.
• Remember what it felt like.
• Observe that person, how they are showing up, what

they are doing. Write down some of the qualities that you experienced /

• bserved of that person.

Leadership Reflection Exercise #2

Think of a specific, challenging situation where YOU showed up with hosting/leadership that had a positive influence.

• Picture the situation and people.
• Remember what it felt like.
• Observe yourself, how are you showing up, what you

are doing? Write down some of the qualities that you experienced /

• bserved in yourself.

Leadership Reflection Exercise #3

Think of a specific, challenging situation where YOU DID NOT show up with hosting/leadership that had a positive influence.

• Picture the situation and people.
• Remember what it felt like.
• Observe yourself, how are you showing up, what you are

doing? Write down some of the “qualities” that you experienced /

• bserved in yourself.

Valuable… but not enough…

• Self Awareness
• Knowledge and skills
• Positive Intention

How do we shift limiting patterns and create the conditions for emergent qualities we need for complex contexts?

Limiting Beliefs

What we are thinking and believing (our assumptions and predictions) can LIMIT our ability to:

• Step into and stay in meaningful dialogue and co-creation
• Listen with genuine curiosity
• Think creatively, see and hold different perspectives,
• Learn, evolve
• Speak with intention, clarity, courage, respect
• Be aware of our impact
• Let go of control
• Use power in service
• Practice Grace - self and others
• Be present and well with discomfort, change, uncertainty

The Work

A simple and powerful tool for working directly with your limiting beliefs and patterns.

• Open your mind to insights & perspectives
• Shift underlying patterns that keep you stuck
• Access your wisdom and resourcefulness
• Cultivate a mindset that is more open& creative

In writing or with a facilitator

The WORK has two parts:

• 1. Identify

The beliefs that are limiting / causing stress.

• Judgements, fears, assumptions, blame, should/

shouldn’t, attachment to outcome.

• 2. Inquire

Using the 4 Questions and Turnarounds

• Inquire. Reflect. Be deeply curious.
• New insights, perspectives and possibilities.

Focus on a specific situation. Identify the thoughts and beliefs that cause stress, fear, disconnection, or keep you stuck.

• Write them down (make a list)
• Short simple sentences.
• Do not censor or be ‘wise’
• Choose ONE belief to inquire.

Identify

Part 1

Getting Un-Stuck: Working with Fear.

• Think of a specific situation of something that

feels important for you to do, and you are afraid to do it, avoiding it, stressed about it.

• (Challenging conversation; stepping into

leadership; collaborating with someone; taking an action, speaking up; letting go of control…)

• Write it: I want to: __________________ - or -
• It is important to me to: ___________

Getting Un-Stuck: Working with Fear Making your list

• What are you afraid will happen if you do it?
• Write all stressful thoughts:
• If I ______(the action)___________ then:

Getting Un-Stuck: Working with Fear Choose ONE belief

Write it as

• If I ______(the action)___________
• then: ___________(one belief) _________
• Caitlin example: If I collaborate with J,
• then she will make me look bad.

Part 2

Inquire

THE 4 Questions and Turnarounds of The WORK

• Specific Situation and One belief at a time
• Open your mind. Be curious. Contemplate.
• Find your own answers

Work with a facilitator or in writing

Part 2 INQUIRE - Blue Card

The 4 Questions of The WORK

Belief: _______________________________

• 1. Is it true? Yes/No
• 2. Can you absolutely know that it is true? Yes/No
• 3. How do you react, when you believe that thought?
• Emotions, sensations, images, actions, limitations

• 4. Who would you be without that thought?
• What do you experience and notice?

Turn it around

• Open your mind to what else is possible.
• Find genuine examples for each turnaround.
• Access multiple perspectives
• PURPOSE is insight, learning & empowering self-

responsibility

• Not denial, self-blame, condoning.

“One point of view is too small for the truth.”

unknown

Turn it Around

and find genuine, specific examples

Belief: Opposite: _____________________

Examples:

Other:________________________

Examples:

Self: __________________________

Turn it Around

and find genuine, specific examples

Belief: (if I collaborate with her then) “she will make me look bad”. Opposite: she won’t make me look bad Opposite: she will make me look good Other: I am making her look bad Self: I am making myself look bad

Turn it Around

and find genuine, specific examples

Belief: (if I collaborate with her then) “she will make me look bad”. EXTRA Opposite: If I DON’T collaborate with her, she will make me look bad. examples: is there any valuable insight or truth from this perspective?

Silence.

• Give yourself (and your partner) some space

for reflection and integration.

• The Work ‘works’ at many levels of your mind,
• ver a period of time.
• Do not interrupt that process with analysis,

advice or problem solving.

The 4 Questions of The WORK

Belief: (if I ___) then ____________________

• 1. Is it true? Yes/No
• 2. Can you absolutely know that it is true? Yes/No
• 3. How do you react, when you believe that thought?
• Emotions, sensations, images, treat that person? Treat

yourself? What do you get? What does it stop you from being able to do?


• 4. Who would you be without that thought?
• What do you experience and notice?

Turn it Around

and find genuine, specific examples

Belief: Opposite: _____________________

Examples:

Other:________________________

Examples:

Self: __________________________

Turn it Around

and find genuine, specific examples

Belief: (If I ________) then x will judge me. Opposite: x won’t judge me negatively Examples. Opposite: x will judge me positively Examples:

Turn it Around

and find genuine, specific examples

Belief: (If I ________) then x will judge me. Other: I am judging x (negatively) Examples:

Turn it Around

and find genuine, specific examples

Belief: (If I ________) then x will judge me. Self: I am judging myself (negatively) Examples:

Questions and Sharing

• What did you experience?
• Questions about doing The Work.

Applying The Work

• Purpose is learning, growth, insight, evolving,

alignment, connection, contribution, wellbeing, healing, resilience….

• Practice with compassion, curiosity, rigour (lean

in…)

• Future, past and current situations.
• Fear, judgement, attachment, reactivity, bias,

avoidance, stress and suffering….

• Different Exercises to “Identify” - fear exercise,

underlying beliefs; Judge your Neighbour Worksheet..

Questions and Sharing

• How does what you are learning about your
• wn patterns connect to your systems change

work?

• How does it make a difference for you to

work with your own limiting beliefs?

• What can we learn about human limiting

beliefs and patterns through our own work?

Fear

All limiting thinking patterns have some connection to fear and activates fear/stress responses in our mind and nervous system. Fear of: losing something; being wrong; safety; survival; threat to identity; loss of control; uncertainty/not knowing; failure Inquiry helps our mind to align itself with the reality of life without shutting down/reacting into a limiting way So we can Be open, connected, creative, strong and vulnerable, agile, learning, fully present: in change, challenges, uncertainty, vulnerability, joy, intimacy, failure, success…

Doing The Work in writing

Self-facilitation

• Identify a situation, connect to the emotion and make

your list of thoughts (Fears, judgements, attachments..)

• Identify one thought/belief to work on.
• Write that one belief at the top of the page (self-

facilitation handout or notebook)

• Ask yourself each of the questions - one at a time,

reflect, and then write down your answers.

• Find each Turnaround and examples.
• Use handouts as a guide.

Written self-facilitation guide

The Work

One Belief at a Time

Identify one belief or concept about a person or situation where you are stuck, reacting or experiencing stressful emotion. Write it down on the line below in a short, simple, uncensored sentence. With the specifjc stressful situation in mind, answer each of the 4 questions, one at at a time. Be curious. Contem- plate each question and then write your answer down. Then turn the original statement around and fjnd specifjc, genuine examples. If you shift into justifjcation, or defense, stop and move back to inquiry. (See Instructions for doing The Work for more information) Belief: _____________________________________________________________ 1) Is it true? __________________ Answer only 'yes' or 'no.' 2) Can you absolutely know that it is true? __________________ Again answer only 'yes' or 'no.' Take time to really contemplate. 3) How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought? _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ · What emotions and sensations do you experience? · What images come to mind (past, future or

• ther)?

· How do you show up when you are believing the thought? · How do you treat the person in that situation? How do you treat others? Be specifjc. · How do you treat yourself? · What do you get for holding onto this thought? (payofg) · What are you not able to do when you believe it?

Self -facilitation guide

Transforming Limiting Beliefs: The Work with Caitlin Frost

Resources and Practice

• Caitlin Frost - website, resources, online and in

person courses and coaching. www.caitlinfrost.ca

• CF work today adapted from The Work of

Byron Katie.

• The Work, Byron Katie website

www.thework.com

• The Work App