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Interpersonal Communication at Work - Emotional Life (Presentation Slides)

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2 authors: Some of the authors of this publication are also working on these related projects: 'Unhygienic' research View project Co-editing a Journal special issue - Impact of the Fourth industrial revolution on a Learning Organization View project Tom Cockburn The Leadership Alliance Inc

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Cheryl Ainslie Cockburn-Wootten The University of Waikato

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Electronic copy available at: https://ssrn.com/abstract=3077582

Interpersonal communication at work

Emotional life

Dr Tom Cockburn & Dr C. Cockburn-Wootten

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1bvdxjC2A_8&feature=player_embedded

Electronic copy available at: https://ssrn.com/abstract=3077582

Preview

Recap key identity model Discuss and define key communication

features and forms of organisational resistance to change

Define and discuss emotional labour

and emotional IQ (EQ)

Review implications for managing and

being managed

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 2

The Cultural web in organisations—what’s your role in all this? Can/Should you resist?

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 3

Stories The paradigm Symbols Power structures Rituals Business Routines Organisational structures Management systems Ethnic Diversity Technology Physical spaces You?

Adapted from Johnson & Scholes, 1984 [1999])

Communication features (1): Process

• Communication is a process not a

disconnected event

• You don’t stop communicating when you

stop talking (e.g., intrapersonal communication inside your head rarely stops and impacts on social relations)

• Remember communication is circular and

transactional not linear and one way

• OR No followers = no leaders

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 4

Features (2): Complexity

1 Who you are 2 Who you think the other person is 3 Who you think the other person thinks you are 4 Who the other person thinks s/he is 5 Who the other person thinks you are 6 Who the other person thinks you think s/he is

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten

Two people = six people:

5

Features (3): Irreversibility

• You cannot undo communication: So be

aware of the power of symbols (e.g., parking spaces, office sizes, travel class) and your words (e.g. term ‘follower’ or ‘stakeholder’ or ‘collaborator’)

• If you stuff up you have to live with it and

work to restore relationship

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 6

Features (4): Total person involvement

• You are your communication (how else

will most people know you?)

• Using communication skills without

honesty makes you manipulative and puts sustainable relationships at risk

• If (someone believes) you only say things

to deceive or manipulate then you are unlikely to inspire trust or retain credibility

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 7

Features (5): Relating

• Communication as the making and

taking of sense is an ongoing relationship

• Discourses (e.g., definitions)
• rganise practices in workplaces and

life spaces

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 8

Communication and the self

Intrapersonal communication and your

personal brand ‘advertising’

Self concept = Your image of who you are or

aspire to be or seek to be known as.

Composed of:

Others’ (esp. ‘significant others’) images

• f you that they share (un)consciously

Social comparisons - often like to like How you take and make sense of these

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Open Self Hidden Self Blind Self Unknown Self

Known to Self Not Known to Self

Known to Others Not Known to Others

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 10

Joseph Luft & Harry Ingram (‘Johari’)

Johari Window (2)

Open: What you knowingly share about

you and is on ‘public record’ (what you know, what you know they know)

Blind: Represents information about

yourself that others know but you don’t

Unknown: Represents parts of yourself

about which neither you nor others know

Hidden: Contains what you know of

yourself but hide from others.

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 11

Self esteem

Self esteem = the way you feel about yourself

Recommendations:

Attack your self destructive beliefs Engage in self-affirmation Seek out nurturing people Work on projects that will result in success Remember you do not have to be loved by

everyone (nor to make needless enemies)

Sometimes no is the right answer

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 12

Self disclosure

Self disclosure = communication in which you reveal information about yourself

Rewards of self disclosure:

Self-knowledge Coping abilities Communication efficiency Relational depth

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 13

Next-light and dark in emotions at work

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 14

Dangers of self-disclosure

• Personal and social rejection
• Material loss
• Intrapersonal difficulties

08/04/06 15 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten

Guidelines for disclosing

• Check intent of motivation
• Check context and relationship
• Monitor reciprocity
• Consider possible consequences
• E.g. ‘Coming out’…

08/04/06 16 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten

Johari has a shadow side

The model appears to assume ‘honesty’ The value and function of self-disclosure

may however depend on timing (i.e. what you disclose, to whom and when you disclose it)

Can accommodate ‘collusion’ and

conspiracy

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 17

Open Self Hidden Self Blind Self Unknown Self

Known to Self Not Known to Self Known to Others and disclosed Not Known to Others

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 18

Joseph Luft & Harry Ingram (‘Johari’) via Hase,Davies & Dick(1999) Question:Can this model be applied at the organisational level?

Others know this but won’t disclose

Things I hide

Emotions add value

Research by Watson Wyatt has shown that “Companies with

highly committed employees experienced greater 3 year shareholder returns (112%) than companies with low employee commitment (76%)”.

Work by McKinsey has demonstrated that “Companies who

scored highly in their ability to manage talent earned, on average, a 22% higher return to shareholders than their industry peers. Companies that scored low on talent management earned no more than their peers did”.

Studies carried out by Sheffield university’s Institute of Work

Psychology have shown that “18% of variations in productivity and 19% in profitability could be attributed to the effectiveness of “people management”.

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten

So, is there anything else needed?

19

Provocations to a debate

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten

Discuss these 5 quotes. What do they say about your emotions, employment, identity and success? Are they true or false?

For employee success, loyalty and integrity are equally as important as ability (Harry F. Banks) Swift instinct leaps; slow reason feebly climbs (Edward Young) The advantage of emotions is that they lead us astray

(Oscar Wilde)

The degree of one’s emotion varies inversely with one’s knowledge of the facts—the less you know the hotter you get

(Bertrand Russell)

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

(Eleanor Roosevelt)

20

Internal Communications: Emotions and the organisation

Implication for managing emotions in

businesses

Learning & identification Emotional Labour & Emotional IQ

Emotional labour (see Hochschild, 1983)

Display rules Expressed/external emotions constrained by

employment rules.

Impression management e.g. Disney employees,

McD’s etc.

EL benefits org and individuals

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 21

Defining Emotional IQ (EQ)

EQ is not:

Measure of intelligence Being nice Giving in to your feelings Linked to inherited characteristics

EQ is:

Leadership & relationships “It is the capacity for recognizing our own feelings

and those of others, for motivating ourselves, and for managing emotions well in ourselves and in our relationships.”

Daniel Goleman, 1998

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 22

A framework for EQ

EQ has two aspects--understanding and

managing yourself and understanding others.

Goleman identified 5 key EI ‘domains’:

Knowing your emotions. Managing your emotions. Motivating yourself. Recognising and understanding other

peoples’ emotions.

Managing relationships, i.e. managing other

peoples’ emotions.

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 23

Perceived benefits of high EIQ

Individual:

Handle stress & manage feelings Better social skills Better chances of career success

Organisation:

Improved communication between team members Responding appropriately to feelings in ourselves & others Managed relationships and network building Innovative teamwork & corporate transformation Developing trustworthiness

Leadership

Leader max power to sway others emotions Allows effective relationship mngt Brings in tacit and explicit knowledge (Maturity and commonsense) Does develop a more rounded approach to leadership and org

climate

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 24

Critique: Emotional IQ

Discourses of mngt “packaging has been

crucial to its acceptability” (Fineman, 2003, p. 48).

Appeals to the control/rational aspect

regarding emotions

See emotions as something that can be

changed or learnt

Fails to take into account external context,

power and very Eurocentric

Values bias

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 25

A final critique of EIQ

Tends to simplify emotions and emotional

intelligence

Focuses on the individual Determines a moral order of emotions. Assumes that we can readily identify, sift and

select appropriate emotions and that this is good. People may adopt certain emotional responses at work but they are far from simple expressions of emotional intelligence – they

• nly represent responses to managerial

dictates

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 26

Summary

Organizations have increasingly tried to

dominate and control emotions both internally and externally

Emotional labour / EIQ have become features

• f org life – one form of the management of

meaning

Issues about complexity and emotional

regimes (Cockburn, 2006*) *Cockburn, T (2006). *A complexity based typology of emotional regimes in teams, ITPNZ conference paper, Napier, New Zealand, 28-29th

September

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 27

Summary:Emotions in the workplace

Miller identified 5 different kinds of emotions in

• rganisational communication

Emotional labour Emotional work Emotion with work Emotion at work…being bullied

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ReJ1MYB8Yg&feature=related

Emotion towards work---Joy and contentment

• http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OuP3Gxnd-vE

Control & management Something to think about…Does Miller’s model deal

adequately with the work/life interface?

08/04/06 Tom Cockburn & Cheryl Cockburn- Wootten 28