Co-Parenting from the Pasture Horse powered learning for divorcing, - - PowerPoint PPT Presentation

L I N D S A Y H I L D R E T H A D L E R G R A D U A T E S C H O O L M A S T E R ’ S P R O J E C T

Co-Parenting from the Pasture

Horse powered learning for divorcing, never married parents, and same sex couples

A little about me…

 Adler Graduate School Student, LMFT Track  Intern at Acres for Life Center for Growth and

Learning

 EAGALA Certified since 2008

There is something about the outside of a horse that is good for the inside of a man.

~Winston Churchill

Equine Assisted Psychotherapy

Equine Assisted Psychotherapy (EAP) is the practice of using horses for emotional growth. Participants in therapy use feelings, behaviors, and patterns to better understand the horse and themselves. (EAGALA.org) The field of using horses for therapy is new and growing rapidly. Although limited, research appears to show EAP as being very effective in building confidence, improving communication and giving personal insights to those participants involved. EAP can also help individuals of all ages and backgrounds in areas of problem solving, conflict resolution, and relationships (Trotter, 2008).

Other Common Types of Equine Therapy

Equine Assisted Learning Therapeutic riding Hippotherapy Therapeutic Horsemanship

Equine Assisted Psychotherapy

 An experiential method that provides a hands-on

approach to learning

 Incorporates horses, expressive art, movement,

sound etc. Uses all senses!

 You’ll “feel” the learning not just intellectualize it –

helps you move from theoretical change into action!

 Short term, interventional type of therapy  It’s not riding the horses…all activities are on the

ground

Why Horses?

Activity

Why Horses Activity

Why Horses, cont.

 Naturally intimidating to many, horses are large and

powerful.

 Like humans, horses are social animals, with defined

roles within their herds.

 Horses provide vast opportunities for metaphorical

learning

 Horses require us to be mentally and physically

engaged

 Most importantly, horses mirror human body

language.

What do horses have to do with co-parenting?

It is estimated that approximately one half of recently contracted marriages will end in divorce (Kenny, 2000; Wesolowski, Nelson, & Bing, 2008). As a result, many children experience the dissolution of their “family” as they know it. Divorce is a very unsettling experience, for both the adults divorcing, and their children. Research has examined the effects divorce has on children. Children experience grief and loss, and can have a variety

• f reactions and changes in psychological well-being, and

many of the side effects of divorce are exacerbated by the level of conflict between parents (Ross, 2010).

Co-Parenting

 It is widely agreed upon that the two years following

a divorce have the greatest adjustment period, and are most difficult in terms of acute reactions (Portnoy 2008).

 The two years post-divorce can have the most

intense challenges, but is also the window of

• pportunity for positive change (Portnoy).

Co-Parenting

 There is much diversity in the nature of divorce, and thus

much diversity in how children experience divorce.

 As more research has been conducted on the impacts of

divorce on children, more interventions have been put in place to help negate some of the negative impacts caused by divorce.

 Further compounding children’s difficulties are their

parents’ own struggles with the changes in the family system (Strohschein,2005).

Co-Parenting

“Healthy adjustment for children of divorce has been associated with effective and cooperative co- parenting and minimal inter-parent conflict. The quality of the post-divorce parenting relationship and the parenting skills of each parent have been identified as the most significant contributors to child adjustment and are among the factors that clinicians can reasonably hope to impact” Macie & Stolberg, 2003 (p.90)

Models of Co-Parenting

 Conflicted: defined as when separated couples and ex-spouses

make hateful comments about each other, seek to undermine each other’s relationship with the child, and fight openly in front of the child. The child is at risk of serious and lasting emotional harm.

 Cooperative: parents put the well-being of their children first.

Cooperative co-parenting can be difficult to obtain, but is believed to best support the needs of children.

 Parallel: Parallel co-parenting is the most common form of co-

parenting and is the easiest to implement. Still has issues; lack

• f communication, child manipulation, and monitoring older

children.

So, why horses and co-parenting?

 The best option for co-parenting as it relates to a

child’s wellbeing and psychological and emotional health is the cooperative co-parenting style.

 We are striving for more cooperative parenting, and

horses may just be the tool!

 Horses give almost immediate, and honest feedback,

necessary for the clients working with them.

Co-Parenting and horses

 EAP would allow for parents to work toward the most ideal

parenting relationship, in which two parental systems can function independently of one another, but cooperatively, and with mutual respect.

 An Equine Assisted Co-Parenting intervention would offer a

new approach to assisting conflicted parents to better meet their children’s needs.

 Using the horses, parents can practice different scenarios, and

deal with the emotions of those scenarios as they come up, giving them the opportunity to practice changing negative emotions and reactions into emotions and behaviors that promote a positive environment for their children.

How Does It Work?

 Piggy backs other theoretical models

 Solution Focused  Adlerian  Gestalt  Experiential

 Projection  S.P.U.D.’s  Clean Language  Activities

 This is not talk therapy with horses present!

Activities Promote

 Creative problem solving and decision making  Learning how to ‘ask for help’  Putting Behavior Into Action  Communication – verbal and non-verbal  Self awareness  Self confidence / esteem  Healthy boundaries  Trust of self and others  Ownership of own feelings  Healing in an emotionally safe environment free from

judgment, expectation and agenda

 Honesty

Co-Parenting Solution

 8 session Equine Assisted Psychotherapy co-

parenting activity manual.

 Can be used in conjunction with any co-parenting

curriculum or independently.

Benefits of EAP

 Fresh perspective – Engaging belief that this could be

different.

 Getting out of the head and into the heart; connecting

with emotions (Holism)

 Opportunity to put learning’s into action – knowledge

transfers into behaviors (eliminating Yes, But…)

 Practice new -skills in a safe environment –

Strengthening Distress Tolerance (The courage to be imperfect)

 Feeling the power of ‘Belonging’  Healthier Families!!!

Questions?

Thank you for your time!

References

In Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for The Degree of Master of Arts in Adlerian Counseling and Psychotherapy



Equine Assisted Growth and Learning Center. What is EAP and EAL? Retrieved from http:// www.eagala.org/Information/What_Is_EAP_EAL on January 21, 2013.



Kenny, M. C. (2000). Working with children of divorce and their families. Psychotherapy: Theory, Research, Practice, Training, 37(3), 228-239.



Macie, K. M., & Stolberg, A. L. (2003). Assessing Parenting After Divorce: The Co-Parenting Behavior

• Questionnaire. Journal Of Divorce & Remarriage, 39(1/2), 89-109.



Ross, L. & Wynne, S. (2010). Parental depression and the divorce and adult children’s well-being: The role of family unpredictability. Journal of Child and Family Studies, Vol 19(6), 757-761.



Portnoy, S. M. (2008). The Psychology of Divorce: A Lawyer's Primer, Part 2: The Effects of Divorce on

• Children. American Journal Of Family Law, 21(4), 126-134.



Strohschein, L. (2005). Parental divorce and child mental health trajectories. Journal of Marriage and Family, 67, 1286–1300.



Trotter, K., Chandler, C., Goodwin-Bond, D., Casey, J., (2008). A comparative study of the efficacy of group equine assisted counseling with at-risk children and adolescents. Journal of Creativity in Mental Health 3(3), 254-284.



Wesolowski, K. L., Nelson, W., & Bing, N. M. (2008). Relationship components and nature of postdivorce parenting responsibilities among individuals going through a divorce. Journal Of Divorce & Remarriage, 49(3-4), 258-271.