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Supporting children in accommodating parental separation and divorce Dr Sue Kay-Flowers Email: info@susankay-flowers.com OR S.J.Kay-Flowers@ljmu.ac.uk Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and


  1. Supporting children in ‘accommodating’ parental separation and divorce Dr Sue Kay-Flowers Email: info@susankay-flowers.com OR S.J.Kay-Flowers@ljmu.ac.uk Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  2. • Registered Social Worker • Academic since 2002 • Research interest children’s rights and participation • Current role: Senior Lecturer Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  3. Also might be interested in: Th The e Con onversatio ion: Kay- Flowers, S. (2019) Here’s what young people say helped them get through their parents’ divorce, The Conversation, 04.10.19. Blog: Kay- Flowers, S. (2019) Understanding children’s ‘accommodation’ of parental separation and divorce, Centre for Research on Families and Relationships (CRFR), 07.10.19. Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  4. An estimated 1 in 3 children in the UK will experience their parents’ separation or divorce before the age of 16 (Layard and Dunn, 2009; Fortin et al, 2012) Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  5. Why is this an issue? Recognises Adverse Childhood DfE identifies: Experiences (ACEs) that may have an • Overt parental conflict including impact on children include domestic violence ‘Loss or separation – resulting from • Family breakdown (including death, parental separation, where children are taken into care divorce…..family conflict or breakdown of adopted) that results in the child having to live elsewhere, being taken into care or as risk factors associated with adopted, deployment of parents in mental health outcomes armed force families’ (p.18) From: DfE (2018) Mental health and behaviour in schools Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  6. Issues for children • Often feel isolated, tend to avoid In school crowded places, prefer sitting • May lack motivation, engage less alone in class, become withdrawn • May experience: low mood, • Impact on academic depression, mood swings or performance display an aggressive attitude • Their mood/behaviour may • Feel insecure, unsupported by impact on relationships with mother or father with issues staff and children they face Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  7. My research study Research Design: determined through Focus : giving ‘voice’ focus group discussions to young adults’ with young people everyday childhood experiences of Sample: young adults parental separation aged 18-30 who had and divorce experienced parental separation in childhood Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  8. Research design: focus group decisions Short video clip Online Internet on YouTube questionnaire website Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  9. Accommodation Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  10. Levels of accommodation High • Satisfaction: positive improvement in their life • Full acceptance of post-separation changes • Satisfaction: neither a positive improvement nor Medium a significant loss • Acceptance: neither a negative nor a positive view - ‘it is as it is’ • Satisfaction: remaining sense of loss or, very Low significant loss in their lives • Acceptance: struggle to accept post-separation changes Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  11. Conflict Communication Support/talking Reactions Framework for understanding children’s accommodation of parental separation LOW HIGH MEDIUM Kay-Flowers, S. (2019) Childhood experiences of separation and divorce, Bristol: Policy Press (forthcoming) Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  12. Use in schools Special Educational Needs Co-ordinators Early indication of need Home-school (SENCos), Pastoral staff for additional support partnerships and multi-agency interventions Forthcoming Therapeutic use with Relationships education child/ren curriculum Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  13. How might this be used in schools? Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  14. Any questions? Email: info@susankay-flowers.com OR S.J.Kay-Flowers@ljmu.ac.uk Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

  15. References • Department for Education (DfE) (2018) Mental Health and Behaviour in Schools . Available at https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/mental-health-and-behaviour-in- schools--2 (Accessed 09.05.19) • Fortin, J., Hunt, J. & Scanlan , L. (2012) ‘ Taking a longer view of contact: The perspectives of young adults who experienced parental separation in their youth’, Sussex: Sussex Law School, University of Sussex. • Kay-Flowers, S. (2019) Childhood Experiences of Separation and Divorce: Reflections from Young Adults, Bristol: Policy Press • Kay- Flowers, S. (2019) Here’s what young people say helped them get through their parents’ divorce, The Conversation, 04.10.19. Available at: http://theconversation.com/heres-what-young-people-say-helped-them-get-through- their-parents-divorce-121907 • Kay- Flowers, S. (2019) Understanding children’s ‘accommodation’ of parental separation and divorce, Centre for Research on Families and Relationships (CRFR), 07.10.19. Available at: http://crfrblog.blogspot.com/2019/10/understanding-childrens- accommodation.html • Layard, R. & Dunn, J. (2009) ‘ A Good Childhood ’, London: Penguin Attachment Research Community (ARC) Annual Conference, Birmingham Conference and Events Centre, 21.11.19

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