Keeping Your Love Alive The Presenter Cathy Alford Cathy is an - - PowerPoint PPT Presentation

Keeping Your Love Alive

The Presenter

Cathy Alford Cathy is an executive coach and is credentialed with ICF – the International Coach Federation. She partners with her clients to identify individual strengths, team dynamics, and growth opportunities for intentional and engaged living. She is director of LifeWorks Resource Group, a coaching and counseling center located in Columbus, Georgia. As an adjunct faculty member at Columbus State University, Cathy has taught coach training as part

• f the Master of Science Organizational Leadership
• Program. She is a contributing author in the book

Inspired Women Succeed and the author of If Only We Could Talk: Three Simple Steps to Parent-Teen Conversations.

Main Topics

• Types of love relationships
• The keys to longevity
• Coping with relationship challenges and conflict
• Balancing styles and keeping it fresh
• The 10 relationship essentials

Types of Love Relationships

• Eros
• Ludus
• Storge
• Pragma
• Mania
• Agape

How Do You Want Your Partner to Express Love?

• A. I like to receive notes of affirmation
• r

I like to be hugged

• B. I like to spend one-to-one time with a person who is

special to me

• r

I feel loved when someone gives practical help to me

• C. I like to sit close to people whom I enjoy being around
• r

I like for people to tell me I am attractive/handsome

Poll

How do you prefer to express your love for your partner?

• A. Words of affirmation
• B. Acts of service
• C. Giving gifts
• D. Quality time
• E. Physical touch

The Triangular Theory of Love

• Intimacy
• Passion
• Commitment

Quote

“Love at first sight is easy to understand; it's when two people have been looking at each other for a lifetime that it becomes a miracle.”

• Amy Bloom

The Keys to Longevity

• Establish “we” time and

respect “me” time

• Be clear about relationship

expectations and boundaries

• Discover interests to share

as a couple as well as solo

More Keys to Longevity

• Show appreciation frequently
• Learn to fight “fair”
• Distinguish between the

mountains and the molehills

• Recognize your individual and

relationship communication patterns

Poll

All relationships face challenges at some point – it’s

• inevitable. However, it’s not necessarily the challenge

that holds the greatest weight. Rather, it’s how you respond to the challenge that has the greatest impact.

• A. I agree
• B. I disagree

Coping With Relationship Challenges

• Is the issue situational, a reflection of communication

strategies, or both?

• Does the issue truly need to be addressed, or do you

just want him or her to be more like you?

• How do external relationships, childhood issues, and
• ther commitments influence your perceptions?

Conflict Management Styles

• Compromising
• Competing
• Collaborating
• Avoiding
• Accommodating

Quote

“Love is a choice you make from moment to moment.”

• Barbara De Angelis

Balancing Relationship Styles

• Identify key communication preferences and stress

management strategies

• Identify misperceptions and corresponding conclusions

stemming from different styles

• Remember that what the behavior means to your

partner may be different from what it means to you

Poll

What do you feel is your greatest relationship challenge?

• A. Boredom
• B. Not enough quality time together
• C. Trying to keep up with everything else
• D. Feeling unappreciated
• E. External pressures and/or other family relationships

Keeping It Fresh

• Plan surprises – what has your partner always

wanted to do?

• Plan a weekend getaway
• Separate relationship issues from general life issues

The 10 Relationship Essentials

• 1. Maintain a sense of humor
• 2. Be generous with praise
• 3. Learn what is most important to your partner in terms of

sharing your love

• 4. Be creative in expressing appreciation
• 5. Don’t expect your partner to read your mind

The 10 Relationship Essentials

• 6. Regularly schedule special time together
• 7. Identify the real issue when disagreeing
• 8. Listen without judging or correcting
• 9. Forgive and let go

10.Keep in mind what really matters in the big picture

When to Seek Support From a Professional

Sometimes life stressors can become more than any

• ne person, or even any one couple, can manage on

their own. Individual or couples counseling can help you navigate situations where you feel “stuck” or

• verwhelmed. These may include
• Life transitions that leave you feeling unsettled or “adrift”
• Feeling “stuck” in patterns or on issues that you can’t seem to

resolve

• Stressors such as health, mental health, or addiction issues
• Family or financial stressors

Resources

Contact your EAP

• r

Work-Life Program for Assistance

Thanks for Joining Us!

Questions?

Works Cited

Becker-Phelps, L. (2011, September 29). 10 essential factors for a healthy relationship. Retrieved January 13, 2016, from http://blogs.webmd.com/art-of- relationships/2011/09/10-essential-factors-for-a-healthy-relationship.html Chapman, G. (n.d.). The five love languages. Retrieved January 13, 2016, from http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile Dewey, R. D. (n.d.). Six types of love. In Psychology: An introduction (part 3). Retrieved January 13, 2016, from http://www.intropsych.com/ch16_sfl/six_types_of_love.html King, V. (2009, October 14). Six styles of love. Retrieved January 13, 2016, from http://valarie-king.hubpages.com/hub/Understanding-Different-Types-of-Lovers

Works Cited

Meier, J. D. Five conflict management styles at a glance. Retrieved January 13, 2016, from http://sourcesofinsight.com/conflict-management-styles-at-a-glance Whitbourne, S. K. (2013, August 17). Which of the seven types of love relationships fits yours? Retrieved January 13, 2016, from http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment- any-age/201308/which-the-7-types-love-relationships-fits-yours Case study: the triangular theory of love. Retrieved January 14, 2016, from http://psypress.co.uk/smithandmackie/resources/study.asp?study=ch11-cs-02