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Cooling the Flames of Defensiveness Tour Guide: Raj Dhasi - - PowerPoint PPT Presentation
Cooling the Flames of Defensiveness Tour Guide: Raj Dhasi - - PowerPoint PPT Presentation
Cooling the Flames of Defensiveness Tour Guide: Raj Dhasi Defensiveness (p. 1) Questions, comments, rejections, ahas Setting limits on objectionable behaviour Skills to de-escalate defensiveness in others Recognizing and managing your
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Defining Defensiveness (p. 2)
- Serving to protect.
- Devoted to resisting or preventing aggression
- r attack.
- behavior to protect oneself from a perceived
threat or attack
- in the state or condition of being prepared or
required to defend against attack or criticism.
Merriam Webster Dictionary
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For a sink to work well, what is more important – the faucet or the drain? Why?
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Dealing with Defensiveness
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5 Steps to Defusing Defensiveness (p.6)
- 1. Manage your body movement
- 2. Regulate your para-verbal presentation
- 3. Manage your self talk
- 4. Attune
- 5. Respond: de-escalating skills
Self Care
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Dealing with Defensive Behaviour (p. 7)
- Use your para-verbals
- Normalize
- Agree where you can
- Question
- Reframe
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Assertion (p. 8)
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- Describe – what you see or hear that is
problematic for you
- Express
– impact on you or the conversation
- Specify
– what you would prefer
- Refocus – to the matter at hand
Assert (p. 9)
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Key Cooling Skills
- Use your voice
- Normalize
- Agree
- Speak with transparency
- Question
- Reframe
- Assert
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